When you think about the end, it makes you live differently.
In all your wandering, he stops at nothing to bring you back. He’s making all your wrongs right and carrying you home.
I can't pretend to know what war is like. The closest I've come to the horror of it are the movies, and we all know those are hardly the real thing in any category of life. I haven't felt the grief of seeing a fellow soldier take bullets. I don't wake up to the sound of machine guns firing or bombs dropping. I haven't experienced the feeling of hunting an enemy or being hunted. I have no idea where to step to avoid a land mine. I have all my limbs.
Shame will wreck you. It will make you feel about six millimeters tall, when God designed you for so much more. It's caused me to stop dreaming and believing that God can use me. It's caused me to stop having faith that I can actually change, because shame puts the focus inward -- a place we were never designed to stare.
I want to write and to live -- without delay, without anxiety, without quitting, and without expectations that aren't His. Anyone with me?
It's not a matter of how far ahead I can see; it's a matter of my awareness of Him in the present.
I never imagined that my “yes” to Romans 15:20-21 nearly four years before would lead me to another “yes” on December 3, 2016 when my man from Belarus got down on one knee as my boyfriend and got up as my fiancé.